Brevis Fabulam
by semperbrevis
Summary: A series of one shots about different Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood characters at Hogwarts. Rated T for Ed's mouth.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One- The Library

Ron and Harry always teased her for spending free periods in the library, but she didn't let it bother her. If visiting the library more than most people meant she didn't have to copy a friend's homework or study someone else's notes because they fell asleep in class, she was fine with that. Besides, she knew Harry and Ron didn't really mean it when they teased her, since if she stopped studying so hard they wouldn't have anybody to copy off of.  
So she continued going to the library every free period, and during basically all of her other free time to study. It was nice and quiet in there, as hardly any other students used it, and if they did weren't in there very long. She liked the silence, and it made a good place to work on memorizing spells and wand movements without any distractions.  
Today, however, she was going there for comfort.

Snape had made a particularly nasty comment about her being a know-it-all in Potions that day. Although the insult had stung, it hadn't hurt near as much as pretty much every other student agreeing with him.  
She couldn't even remember what he'd said, all she remembered was looking over at the side of the room the Slytherins were sitting at, and seeing them all nodding with their normal smirks plastered on their faces. Then she had glanced over at the Gryffindor side of the room, hoping to find Harry and Ron giving the Slytherins dirty looks, or her sympathetic ones.  
However, when she looked at the other side of the room, all she could see was Ron chuckling - _chuckling_ \- at the comment. He had stopped immeadietly after Harry nudged him and caught sight of Hermione staring at him, but the damage was done. After that she had avoided eye contact with anybody until the end of class, and had hurried out as soon as she could. Ron had been calling out to her, probably to apologize, but she ignored him, and rushed straight to the library.  
She had been about to go to the bathrooms, but she remembered what had happened last time she cried in there, and so went to the next best place.  
So now she was here, in the library, breathing in the scent of books that were hundreds of years old, to ones that had been written in the last decade.  
It never ceased to amaze her, how there were books from nearly every time period here, yet no one took the time of day to even acknowledge the rich history behind them.  
She smiled softly. The books were calming her down already.  
She sighed deeply as she moved farther back into the library, to shelves no one had probably touched in years.  
She came back here sometimes, at times like these, when she didn't want to be found. She entered the section that seemed the dustiest, and picked a book off the shelf at random. She read the title and frowned.  
'The Basics of Alchemy'

Alchemy wasn't something she had researched before.

The most research she'd ever done was when they were in their first year, and were searching for the Philosopher's Stone. Even then, she hadn't found much information. The library didn't have much on alchemy, and the only thing she'd been able to gather was that it was a dead art, and that only a few people knew it today. It could be used to create the Philosopher's Stone, which made the Elixer of Life and gold.

"I hope you don't believe whatever bullshit is in that book."

Hermione whirled around, catching sight of a blond teen putting a book back on the shelf a few feet away from her. She hadn't noticed him before.

"Excuse me," she said. "But who are you?"

The boy turned around to face her.

"Name's Edward Elric," He said, walking over to her and extending a hand. "But you can call me Ed."

Hermione gazed in wonderment at the boy. She had never seen anybody like him.

He had gold eyes, and wore his long blond hair in a braid.

She also noticed that he wasn't exactly following the dress code, as he wore a long red cloak with a black jacket and tight leather pants underneath it.

"My name's Hermione Granger," she said, taking the offered hand and shaking it. Strange, he was wearing gloves. "And why shouldn't I believe what's written in a book about alchemy?"

He shrugged. "Because it's wrong." A frustrated look grew on his face. "They don't even have the law of Equivalent Exchange! What if someone tried alchemy from reading these books and it backfired and killed them because they didn't know about the most basic law?! And all this crap about turning lead into gold! Do they even realize how much that would ruin the economy? And saying that the Philosopher's Stone is only used to create gold and become immortal, I mean-" he stopped and rubbed his head awkwardly. "And I'm ranting again, aren't I? Sorry, I just get kind of frustrated with how ignorant some people are about alchemy."

Hermione was quite stunned by the boy's outburst.

"Oh-erm, that's quite alright," she said. "But if you don't mind me asking, how do _you_ know so much about Alchemy?"

"I'm an alchemist." he said. "It'd be a bit weird if I didn't know anything about it."

"You're an alchemist?!" Hermione exclaimed. "But how? I heard it was extremely difficult to do! And you're still in school, so how did you learn it while learning magic?"

Ed blinked. "Oh, I think you misunderstood!" he said, pulling out a silver pocket watch. "I'm a State Alchemist from Amestris, not a student here. I was just hoping this place would have something I needed, but it turns out it was different from what I was looking for... anyway, your headmaster, Dumblebore or something, said I could have a look around the library and see if it had any information concerning what I was looking for, but it didn't... Anyway, I gotta be going now, got a train to catch. Bye!" And with that he rushed past her, and out of the library.

Hermione stood there, stunned.

* * *

A/N-** So, there's the first one. I'm not really sure why I wrote this, but I just kinda thought it'd be interesting for Hermione to meet Ed in some random place. I don't know. Anyway R&R please! Tell me what you thought and if you have any suggestions for future one shots.**


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own it. Surprise surprise.

Chapter Two

The new alchemy teacher was certainly... different.

For One, he dressed like Michael Jackson.

He even had the top hat.

Unfortunately only a few people got the joke when Harry told it to them, as most of his classmates had grown up in the wizarding world and had no idea who Michael Jackson even was.

And two, he barely taught them any alchemy at all.

At the beginning of the year, he had given them a brief introduction to what alchemy was, and then assigned memorizing the periodic table as homework, telling them to come to him and recite it as soon as they had it down.

There wasn't any due date.

During their class periods, he would recount war stories.

These were quite disturbing.

He described every death in perfect detail, and talked about the beautiful sound his explosions made when mixed with the screams of Ishvalans.

Harry was pretty sure he gave most of the younger students nightmares.

He shook himself out of his thoughts as he arrived at the classroom.

"Ah, hello students," Professor Kimblee said with a sinister grin on his face when they walked through the door.

Once everyone had gotten seated, he stood up and walked in front of his desk, clasping his hands behind his back.

"Today we will be talking about something different," He said. "As much as I love recounting my fondest memories, I am expected to teach you at least some alchemy. Today," He said, his grin widening, "We will be talking about the Philosopher's Stone."

He hit his stomach with a hand, and two shiny red rocks fell out of his mouth and into his hand.

"I have been lucky enough to acquire two," He said, holding the stones up for everyone to see.

"Now, these Philosopher's Stones are quite a bit different from the ones you wizards have. These increase alchemical power, allowing you to bypass the law of equivalent exchange, and do almost anything with alchemy."

Hermione raised her hand.

"Yes, miss Granger," Kimblee said.

"Well," she began, "I know that in the wizarding community there was only one stone, and it was destroyed. How many does Amestris have?"

Kimblee thought for a moment.

"I'm not quite sure," He said. "Probably not more than a hundred. Not many people know how to make them."

"Do you know how to make them?"

Kimblee grinned. "Yes," He said. "I do. Would you like to know how they are made?"

The class looked at each other excitedly.

"I'll take that as a yes," Kimblee said.

He walked over to the board and pulled out a piece of chalk. He drew a rather impressive circle on it (Harry had no idea anyone could draw a perfect circle freehanded) and added a few shapes in it.

"This is more or less the transmutation circle used to create the stones," Kimblee said, gesturing to the board. "However, this is not the exact circle, as I doubt Dumbledore would be very happy if you could make philosopher's stones. Now, who knows the basic principle of alchemy?"

Hermione's hand shot up.

"Yes?"

"Equivalent exchange," She answered at once.

"Correct," said Kimblee. "So, what could the ingredients be to create a philosopher's stone?"

There was silence.

"Why," Kimblee said, a grin forming on his face, "Human souls, of course."

* * *

As they walked out of the classroom, Harry felt sick to his stomach.

"Do you think they actually do that?" Ron asked, his face a bit green.

"I- I don't know," said Hermione. "He didn't really seem like he was joking, but we all know what a sick sense of humor he has..."

"I wonder if that's how Nicholas Flamel made his stone," Harry said. "And if Dumbledore knew about it."

Hermione shook her head. "I don't think so... he said that our version of the stone is different from Amestris's, remember?"

Harry sighed. "I hope so. Anyway, let's just hope Malfoy doesn't get any ideas..."

"Harry, he's only in sixth year. He's not going to be able to figure out how to make a stone."

"Yeah, but there's always the possibility he's a Death Eater. He could report it to Voldemort."

"I don't think that's very likely, Harry," Hermione said as she watched Draco Malfoy walk past them with a grin on his face.

* * *

A/N-** So, there's the second one. I wasn't very happy with this one, and kept going back and editing it, but I didn't want to keep you guys waiting any longer. Leave a review saying what you thought!**

**All flames will be used to cook my dinner.**


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